Friday, March 6, 2009

To Set the Record Straight

Just so nobody gets the wrong impression, with me gushing in adoration for my two little progenies and waxing eloquent about the joy, joy, joy of motherhood, here are the straight facts:

1. Sometimes I yell, snap, scowl, get impatient, sarcastic or generally unpleasant with the 2 adored progenies.

2. Sometimes I am way too soft, as evidenced by the "kinda" sick kid laying on the floor in front of me reading Captain Underpants, who should probably be at school. I have been known to extend bedtimes, rescind punishments, give extra large portions of dessert and I never, ever serve brussel sprouts.

3. I probably spend too much time on the computer / making art / with my nose in a book when I could be baking pies from scratch, hiding cute little notes in their sock drawers and / or actually washing some socks to put in said sock drawers.

4. If I don't spend a certain amount of time selfishly doing my own thing (see # 3), I will lose my ever-lovin' mind. Yes, motherhood is challenging and fulfilling...but is it intellectually stimulating? Nuh-uh.

5. My house is generally messy enough to warrant a visit from some sort of health or child welfare agency (see #4). Please don't tip them off.

6. Sometimes we have sunbutter and honey sandwiches for supper.

7. Last year I forgot about early dismissal day...twice. My children waited for 45 minutes in front of the school before getting the office to call me, and are probably scarred for life.

8. I secretly hate playing action figures (shhhh...don't tell) and have resorted to many underhanded tricks to get out of doing so. There are just so many times I can have my knuckles bashed with the Thing, before I am outta there! (thanks Uncle Craig!) Even worse, if I had girls who played with dollies or Barbies or had sweet little tea parties, I would probably play more often...and longer.

9. I love the moment when the door shuts behind them, as they head out for school. The house is so quiet. I have a cup of tea, and waste time writing strangely confessional blog posts for no particular reason.

Mixed media Klimt inspired artwork for Gary Reef group. The pic is a little dark, but I can't be fussed to take another one (see lazy! Add "lazy" to the list above.)This was hard to do, and after I'd painstakingly painted our faces, I forgot that I'd used some watercolours and tried to wipe back a top layer of walnut ink. Faces partially obliterated! *groan* Fixed them up as best I could, and learned valuable lessons about water solubility.

Ok that's enough of that. I shall recommence polishing my halo of saintly ;)


  1. Motherhood... when I hear that word I think of this golden, Madonna like aura around a person. An ancient, eternal, and reverent feeling overcomes me...yes I am not a mother...however it is such a scared job, and yet so real, everyday, exactly like you described. You have my deepest respect and awe for what you do!
    I LOVE the painting!!!!!!!!!!!!

  2. Yup, that's me a golden madonna-like figure! You are sweet. I have deep respect and awe for what what YOU do. Running entire hotels?? Going to work unexpectedly at 3:00am?? It's like you constantly have a newborn! ;)

    And I'm thrilled to get a comment from a real live sistah!

  3. brussel sprouts sauteed in chicken stock with pancetta are delicious.

    and you're welcome. knuckles are meant to be bashed. mine look like tenderized stew steak.

  4. LOL!! I love numbers 4 and 5. Most of our clothes never get folded and lay waiting on my folding table for someone to retrieve them. I don't get around to all the blogs (mostly just you and the nerdfighters) but I really need the "adult talk" (Yes, I count talking about Senpa as "Adult"!) I feel bad when all the working mom's say the long week-end or break was too short and I'm dancing with a smile on my face singing"School day!School day! Rise and shine it's a school day!"

    Your paintings are just so very beautiful and touching.

    About the Madonna aura. I agree with the feelings and thought but my "Mother" looks tired, has a LARGE mug of coffee/caffeine, and is a little unkempt. Maybe that's just my reflection!

  5. So, what was the point of this post exactly? To point out that...?... you're not perfect? God Lord woman, learn to take a compliment! You are a great mom and we are allowed to sing your praises! I daresay this list makes you an even better mom because you take time for yourself. The ideal of perfection that you have set for yourself is exhausting. I say embrace your greatness and say "Thank you, friends. I am a pretty fabulous mom."

  6. Oooh and love the gold, shiny, swirly painting. So great! (And quit pointing out the flaws and OWN it sista!)

  7. @Mr. H. No brussel sprouts! Have yet to meet a brussel sprout I like, but if B was to make them for me just like that, I would try them...

    @Me, love the mental pic of the unkempt mum with the giant cup of coffee. Fer sure. And Senpa definitely counts as grown up time...he does drink vodka after all. ;)

    @Ms. Front Rowe, you are lovely. And believe me, I bask in the glow of every compliment like a seal on a beach, and I am a fabulous mom. No question. The purpose of the post was to embrace the flaws with humour and grace. I think that Madonna-like mother figure stereotype, does the average mom just as much good as a hole in the head. It sets us up to constantly feel inadequate, no matter how fabulous we really are, warts and all. When I come on here and gush about the thrill and challenge of motherhood, that is indeed my reality and it is pretty damn sweet, and I am proud and happy and often completely incredulous at my good fortune at being where I am in life right now. BUT there is more than that one side to my reality, there are the days when life absolutely sucks, and I can't seem to do anything right and I hate the sound of my own voice, and bedtime can't come soon enough. Both sides very much a part of being a fabulous mom and a real human being. So the blog post was written in a spirit of humour and acceptance, not self deprecation or any type of despair that I am not achieving perfection. I am OK with not being perfect, and getting more OK with it every day, and I am also OK with talking about my imperfections from time to time...just part of the package.

    And the compliments for the painting. Thanks babes! I worked really hard on this one! Also not pointing out flaws to be self deprecating, but sharing a little of what I learned in the process, as in water solubility is not to be ignored!! Remember that, write that down. I'm sure it's somehow part of some greater life lesson to be pieced together in future. ;)

  8. Oh I know all of that, Geck: Just giving you a hard time. In a loving way, of course. ;)

  9. A hard time? Just what I need. ;)

  10. What a rad list. Seriously. Reveal, reveal reveal the truth! We can love each other (and ourselves) more that way. I like your blog!

  11. Thanks so much Maggie May! And I agree 100%. Suddenly we're not so alone, when we share and discover that we're all in this gorgeous mess called life together. :)

  12. Ha! Well maybe I should have used a different turn of phrase and not been so flippant with my response. Basically, for me personally, there's a fine line between humourous self-deprecation and self-loathing. It's a slippery slope, you know? Which means I was probably just projecting. So 'hard time' isn't what I meant. Mostly, I guess I wanted to make sure that you weren't being too hard on yourself. Cause you know, I think you're fabulous.

  13. I know you do K. :) And I know your instinct is just to be protective of me and encourage me. You know that I am an old self-hater from way back, and it is a slippery slope. No worries at all.

    Flip is a tricky thing in text! I just put my virtual foot in my virtual mouth the other day, big time, without even realizing it...just being my sassy self, but nobody got it. Pretty sad when you can hear a pin drop over the internet! LOL

    O, textual communication, I love you so, but you are a cruel mistress! But that's probably a whole new blog post in itself. ;)


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